E                Ab7       C#m
When I'm with my clubber friends
         F#m                           A2        B
I take reluctantly whatever drugs they put in my hand
    E                Ab7         C#m
And when I'm with my nerd friends
F#m                     A2         B
I laugh at references I don't understand

    E        Ab7     C#m
And when I'm with my football mates
  A2            F#m
I sit there quietly and wait
             Bsus4              B
Until they're not talking about football

[Break 1]
    Bm       G7
But when I'm alone
  Bm                       G7
I go into my kitchen and I eat it all out
Bm        G7
When I'm alone
  Bm                       G7
I sit at my computer and I fart my brains out

Em       C7
When I'm alone
           Em              C7
I click on sites you won't believe
A7
Why am I deleting my history?
B                  C         B A
Who am I trying to deceive?

[Verse 2]
E                     Ab7    C#m
And when I'm with my stoner friends
F#m                           A2        B
We go to munchie heaven and I eat all the jam
E                  Ab7    C#m
And when I see my ex-girlfriend
F#m                      A2      B
I tell her all about how happy I am
    E        Ab7       C#m
And when I'm with my political mates
  A2            F#m
I sit there quietly and wait
             Bsus4              B
Until they're not talking about football.

[Break 2]
    Bm       G7
But when I'm alone
  Bm                       G7
I curl up on the floor and I pretend I'm dying
 Bm       G7
When I'm alone
  Bm                       G7
I masturbate at my own reflection crying

Em       C7
When I'm alone
  Em              C7
I see how drunk I can get
B                  C         B A
I look my ex up on the internet

La la la la la la…

[Break 3]
            Bm         G7
And then I make myself sick
  Bm                G7
To make the voices go away
            Bm         G7
And then I eat up the sick
   Bm               G7
To make the voices all come back

Em       C7
And when I'm alone
  Em              C7
I get confused and upset
B                  C         B A
I look myself up on the internet.